Monday, April 7, 2014

More Mustachioes

So, we’ve done the cheesy little ones and the fu manchus. But we’ve also got walruses, and handlebars, and toothbrushes, and Salvador Dalis, and Frank Zappas, and who knows what else. 

So, what are you waiting for?  Read on!

Not quite walrus, but gettin’ there.

Somehow or other, Tom (AKA Tommy) Hutton managed to play for three decades, from 1966 to 1981. I say “somehow” as Hutton got over 300 at bats only once, hit only 22 homers for his whole career (and as a first baseman to boot), and finished with a lowly .248 average and a mere 186 RBIs.

Tom really picked it up after retirement, though – primarily as a broadcaster (he’s been the Marlins’ color commentator since 1997).  He also owns his own baseball academy, and has run the Boston Marathon as well.

Definitely more walrus.  

Doug DeCinces was a pretty decent third baseman. In 15 years in the bigs, he notched almost 6,000 at bats, with 237 homers and 879 RBIs. DeCinces split his career pretty evenly between Baltimore and the Angels. The O’s traded him to make room for some kid named Ripkin or Rypien or Ripon or something (DeCinces had taken over third from some aging geezer named Brook Robertson or Brooke Roberts or something like that).

I love the ‘stache, but what I really like about this one is the shadow.  It makes poor Doug look like Gumby.

Gosh, do you think he shampooed that thing?

This is actually pretty tame for this guy. I can guarantee you that Don Stanhouse will be back in this blog.

I am the walrus / I am the walrus / Goo goo g’joob

Tim Blackwell was a backup catcher – or, as he (or maybe his mom) liked to put it on Wikipedia, a “defensive specialist with good pitch-calling skills and, possessing a strong, accurate throwing arm.” Tim was also able to carry some pretty impressive jockstraps over the years – Bob Boone, Carlton Fisk, Gary Carter …

Oh, his stats? Well … um … er … Okay, how about 10 years, 1,000 at bats, 6 homers, and a .228 average? So, is that backup catcher enough for ya?

Like most backup catchers, though, Tim seemed to actually be paying attention when he was sitting on the bench all those years. He coached and managed in the minors pretty much from the time he hung up his spikes to just a few years ago.

Yup, this card is from the ‘80s, but I couldn’t not include it.

Painted on?

And haven’t we met before? Yup, Don Hood was always at the forefront of fashion.

Unfortunately, I really didn’t talk about Don’s stats in that other post. Well, you can kind of think of Don as something like the pitching equivalent of Tim Blackwell … if you get my drift. 

Over ten years, Don went 34-35, posted a 3.79 ERA, and tallied six whole saves. Comparable players include Roy Henshaw, Chet Nichols, Steve Ridzik, and Bob Chipman. 

By the way, there’s an interesting story behind that last loss – you know, the one that put Don under .500. Turns out it came in the very last game he pitched, on the very last day of the season, on two unearned runs. Some retirement party, huh?

I believe they call this one a handlebar, or perhaps a barhandle or maybe just plain dorky.  I don’t know.  I’m terribly out of the loop when it comes to this sort of thing.

Dick’s a repeat offender. Just last week, I busted him for his fu manchu (which, I guess, is what you get when you let your handlebar get a little out of control). I shared his stats there, but didn’t mention his post-career successes. Dick is now Vice President and Assistant General Manager, Player Personnel for the San Francisco Giants Baseball Club. In fact, he’s been with them for over 20 years.
Of course, we can’t have a ‘stache post without this guy.

But, who is this dude?  Hmm, do you think the ‘stache was just a subtle way to take attention away from that unibrow?

No comments:

Post a Comment