I Love To See You Smile

So, we’ve seen what happens to ballplayers who don’t take care of their teeth.  Now let’s take a look at some who spent entirely too much time in the dentist’s chair.  It’s either that or the illustrators retouching their photos went a tad overboard. 

Anyway, shield your eyes, grab those armrests, open wide (those eyes) and let’s take a look at some pretty serious pearly whites …

I associate this Hall of Famer with home runs (he led the NL seven straight years) and malapropisms (see here for a great list), not with such dazzling dentition.  

Holy sodium fluoride!  Looks like Willie went to the same dentist. 

Willie Crawford played for 14 seasons, all but two with the Dodgers.  A bonus baby, Crawford never really lived up to his potential.  He never managed 500 at bats in a season, or 100 homers for his career.

*

More like “Don Demented,” if you ask me.  This is actually a pretty nice portrait of Don.  He was a rather strange looking dude.  You’ll be seeing more of him, I guarantee.

Don Demeter was not a bad ballplayer.  He was up in the bigs for 11 seasons, hitting 20 or more homers four times.  His best year was 1962, when he batted .307, with 29 homers and 107 RBIs.

So, how about another look at ol' Don?

I tried to make my mouth do this, but I just couldn’t.   That’s quite a talent Eddie’s got – being able to show your molars when you crack a smile.

Eddie Robinson's one of those baseball lifers.  Overall, he's been in baseball 65 years, and played or worked for all of the original AL teams.  Check out his book right here.

It’s not easy showing this expanse of ivory and still making it look like you’re not really smiling.

A pretty non-descript hurler (150 innings over six seasons), Phil Paine was actually the first American to play in Japan.  He pitched nine games for the Nishitetsu Lions in 1953 while over there on military service.  Great bio of him right here.

* - author has this card



The title?  It's from an REM song.